TOLD HIM TO GO BCOZ DIDN’T KNOW HOW TO RESPECT ME….




Abuse

Originally uploaded by facecrunch

ayman just left…

had a fight over attaining a job since he’s been jobless for 2 weeks now…

even though we’re getting parental payments from centrelink now, still prefer earning my own dough than living on handouts…

since his mate ahmed had mention about the prospects about setting up a joint business venture in importing used loaders to egypt from china, which he later did a raincheck on, ayman’s been obsessed since in trying to look for the best deal, where also -if only we had the capital to do so!

thats all he does…goes through pages upon pages of every online trading site you can think of -alibaba…eplaza…wasting internet credit on this when he could be spending his time and money in searching for another job…of which i’ve been mainly doing…

c’mon, we can bearly manage every week and he’s thinking about importing loaders starting from $20000 over as well as setting up his own welding workshop here -of which i was in the middle of helping out with the paper work in getting -first stop certifying his certifcate…i would be keen on the idea if we had the dosh for it but he wasn’t willing to put the idea on the backburner for now…

he basically hogs the lappy day and night -even though its mine, hardly have time to do my errands and even look up stuff to help wit baz and our future….

and what kind of response did i get??? -got called a bitch, stupid, shit because i told him to be realistic and come down from the clouds to reality…

because i said this he said i was intruding his “privacy”, ënjoyment”to dream…like i’m no one yet i’m always the one ending up doing all the paperwork! was starting to shove after i called him stupid for thinking this way towards me and then he threatened to hit me again as well as take baasil from me and swore that he’d stir so much shit for me…

and he took his suitcase and left…

i told him to go back to egypt, that i didn’t need him here and that if he ever thinks of coming back, he can only come back once he learns how to respect women…

called crisis care again because i wanted to know if there was anything that they could do or record of this incident because i was starting to worry about what else ayman might do in terms of inflicting himself and cast the blame at me, like he did the last time we had police intervention…

katie said she would refer to the domestic violence advocacy and referral service of which i will be seeing tomorrow…who happens to be just below the clinic where baz will be doing his 6 weeks check up and the following day will be getting his 2 months needles…

so it’ll just be baz and me now…

why is it so hard for him to respect me…this is what really saddens me…when i love him so much…when i’ve given so much of my life to him, and yet this is still not enough for him to love me, even respect me…

but i know there’s no turning back now…i have to stick to the course…

there’s no point loving a person when he’ll never do any good to you back as much as you deserve regardless of how good you are to him…and he thinks i don’t deserve him…-he’s the one that doesn’t deserve me!

Ya Allah forgive me for everything that I’ve done….make me a better and stronger person from this and help me not repeat past mistakes…please prepare for me something better…deepen and increase my iman…amen…

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~ by nursheikha on May 25, 2009.

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